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PIGLET THREATENED;
APPEAL TO CRITTER
APPEAL TO CRITTER
The News in Brief
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The Gazette has obtained a copy of the ransom note and threatening picture that accompanied it:
WE ARE TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY!
SIGNED,
S.A.R.F.P.
STUFFED ANIMAL REVOLUTIONARY FREEDOM PARTY
The government has released its reply:
The Government of Pooh's Corner does not negotiate with Piglet-nappers. We call on Critter to intervene on our behalf as a neutral party. Any attempt to harm our citizen will be taken...poorly.
Grade A Prime Minister
Pooh's Corner
We at the Gazette hope that this appeal to Critter will be heard, and that the distinguished, though reclusive, diplomat will take up Piglet's cause.
The scrappy Dem will seek re-election next year, it was announced.
Singing Bunny to give concert
Popular singer of "Rock-a-bye Baby" to give free concert at Hammock Arena.
Inchworms demand parity!
The two Inchworms have demanded an independent judge assess who is the longer inchworm.
Doggies to form union
The Association of Stuffed Doggies has announced it will formally become the Stuffed Canine Union and will be open to all sizes.
Rattle Duckie and Fierce Rabbit to wed
Challenging the inter-species marriage ban, the two will apply for a license Saturday, and plan to file a civil suit against the Government.